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Heartbreak Residue

by Briget Boyle

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1.
Crash testing how fast can I go Cement wall, totaled, I didn't know There were soft faces and touching with hands Stepped in a crack, crash land Dreams awaken an open gold mine Accidental cave in, we're losing time Running and racing around Toss my mind into the lost and found I’ve always been seeking the purest of art I never start with an even-keeled heart Turn on the engine press down on the gas Get in the front seat, we're moving fast Heading to places that we do not know Let's watch the sunset, oh, there it goes Tell me your secrets, I'll give you the key To come to my house whenever you need Running and racing around Ross my mind into the lost and found Always been seeking the right way to start But I wasn't built with an even-keeled heart I'll wake and wait I'll wake and wait Good morning my lover, how did you sleep? Are you ready? I'm ready. this could be neat I'll fold the laundry, you make the bed Living this life, in my head Oh wait, I'm asleep a fantasy known I think I am waking, I think I'm alone Running and racing around Toss my mind into the lost and found I always manage to tear things apart Cuz I never start with an even-keeled heart
2.
you read books, I watch TV you like the dishes done before bed I do mine in the morning you like quiet, I sing out loud you know each and every dollar you spend I only notice when I am out you like your coffee black, I like mine with cream there was too much too much difference oh too much too much difference between you and me there was too much too much difference oh too much too much difference between you and me we couldn't keep ourselves happy you drive the speed limit, I always go 80 we tried to find the balance but you couldn't change me there was too much too much difference oh too much too much difference between you and me there was too much too much difference oh too much too much difference between you and me We gave up fighting, no more trying, now we know we stopped crying, no more lying, now we know too much too much too much difference between you and me there was too much too much difference oh too much too much difference between you and me
3.
Mandolin 03:03
Laying down in bed alone for swimming in my head turn off the radio, set the alarm clock pray that I can fall asleep I woke up today after years of pushing this fight cried until the day came to an end didn’t even write down my feelings you drove thousands to get away walked into the grocery store tried to find a little to make my heart soar this is what it’s come to for me a bag of kale, good intent now I’m here, staring at the stove wishin’ for the life that life that we made home you drove thousands to get away when you left and my walls caved in exposed a faulty frame you left your mandolin you drove thousands to get away we took a long drive right next to the lake the sun was setting as we hit the south side the air was cold the water was frozen throwing rocks to break the ice is it true that I’m going crazy that you are lost or are we just lazy I'd drive thousands to find a way you drove thousands to get away when you left and my walls caved in exposed a faulty frame you left your mandolin you drove thousands to get away you drove thousands to get away you left your mandolin
4.
midnight, candle light broken picture, dirty table, empty house tonight can't get started cuz of how we parted Nothing is right I do what I can with the pieces of the puzzle that is who I am lost the the edges and the corners somewhere In the fray so I work my way from the inside when the darkness pulls, starts poking holes I don’t know where to go I try to put these matching keys in locks Loops in sockets We worked together, we used to matter but our framework came out shattered your peace is there, my peace is here connected all the edges, we fit nowhere we saw patterns you were method I was madness, yeah it happens Oh you went away, ripped me in half the gentle stab of rejection when the darkness pulls, starts poking holes I don’t know where to go I try to put these matching keys in locks Loops in sockets these pieces go next to those pieces oh when we know we know, when we know we know when the darkness pulls, starts poking holes I don’t know where to go I try to put these matching keys in locks Loops in sockets I try to put these matching keys in locks Loops in sockets
5.
Apocalypse 03:50
Alone in the apocalypse, why? why? Stay still they say, there ain’t no other way, why? why? I wanna stay alive so I stay inside, I, I I see the open road and I gotta go, I, I I wanna feel alive like I used to I wanna dance all night like I used to I wanna catch a wish upon a star put my foot on the gas and go far But I spend my days, just me and my scars the morning light makes me miss our fights, why? why? the way the coffee smells makes me miss our hell, why? why? You told me you would go so we can finally know why? why? but now that you are gone, how can I go on, I, I I wanna feel alive just like you do I wanna dance all night, but do you? I wanna catch a wish upon a star put my foot on the gas and go far But I spend my days, just me and my scars Alone in the apocalypse, why? why? I wanna spend the day in some other way, I, I wanna run around in the ocean waves, why? why? am I afraid to breathe the air around me, why? why? why?
6.
Weighing me down, shiny things weighing down my hands Chaining me up, Chaining me to a broken man Weighing me down, love was simple then bittersweet Chaining me up, I’m still digging through the memories Oooh you left behind Oooooooooooooh Heartbreak residue Everywhere I look I’m seeing pieces of you sends me spiraling we were broken lovers doing what humans do makin’ heartbreak residue Losing the weight, choking up on the aftertaste starving for touch, still feelin’ the rush of what once was Losing my mind, lost the rest in your bed sheets, your bed frame Bitter as time, you see honey you were never really mine Oooh what could have been? Oooooooooooooh Heartbreak residue Everywhere I look I’m seeing pieces of you sends me spiraling we were broken lovers doing what humans do makin’ heartbreak residue I stood at your throne, I should have known you’d adorn me in jewelry And call me your beauty but I was no more than a fool Now I’m stuck seeing you in everything I do Heartbreak residue - oooh Heartbreak residue, Everywhere I look I’m seeing pieces of you Sends me spiraling broken human lovers doing what humans do Heartbreak residue, when I close my eyes I’m seein’ pieces of you Sends me spiraling we were broken lovers doing what humans do
7.
Birdlike 04:53
8.
Gravity 03:15
you were brave enough earth trembled, your heart shattered this time you fell apart gave up trying, you started, started battles gravity is hard rest your head don’t look down in existential dread we drown the waves you see rely on gravity You thought you were safe enough The abyss stole your knowing Drained the love from your heart Whispered in your ear the world is ending, feel it ending sinister and smart rest your head don’t look down in existential dread we drown the waves you see rely on gravity All around you are edges, sharp edges, promise of pain red sun over falling waters gravity remains rest your head don’t look down in existential dread we drown the waves you see rely on gravity You and I you see rely on gravity You’re not alone
9.
California 03:55
you painted your walls green, I should feel better here but I don’t they kinda look like trees, caving in on me, I won't find myself in this dingy city, it's so cold oh how I miss those sunsets, the California gold I take your dog for a walk, hate every minute that we’re out air is thick as mud, take me back to the west coast drought I know here I'm loved, but never really seen I’m leaving in the morning with a basket full of lonely Going back to California, oh highways, redwood trees bluebirds flying feathery, ocean's edge home for me The family carrot dangles, she tries to make me stay Smile with me nephews every single day they grow up so fast when I see them once a year the kind of love they give me could get me planted here But I'm thinkin' about California, coastal highways, old oak trees bluebirds flying feathery, Knowing that you guide me made of this earth hands in the dirt Steady, steady, finally plane is coming down, out the window I see you You've have all of me, my songs, my heart, my truth Welcome Home California, Drive your highway, climb your trees bluebirds flying feathery, a treasure chest, a home for me oooh California, you got me wilding bluebirds flying feathery, I'm coming home to me
10.
They say we came from the same place That you have our mother’s eyes and I have her voice But my eyes are just like yours and your voice is just like hers We’re tied up and not by choice When you yell you know I’m not like you I know that our blood is like glue It binds us, It binds us All those crimes and misdemeanors That you studied until you bled I know, I know, I know, I know Heavy is your head You say they hurt you bad, they say they did their best We both have a feeling they lied A broken home repeated, he caught her, yeah she cheated He moved away, we never knew why Oh they say that they're sorry it's their fault That our worlds got torn apart It binds us All the crimes and misdemeanors That we could study until we’re dead I know, I know, I know, I know Heavy is your head We come from some porous hearts, broken souls right from start They did the crimes without us in mind Did you hear me when I say I see you? Do you know our blood’s like glue? It binds us All the crimes and misdemeanors Should we forgive them before we’re dead I know, I know, I know, I know heavy is your head
11.
So Sorry 03:19
I know just how I hurt you, will sorry ever do? take away the scarring, rectify the bruise I know just how I hurt you I want to make it right Learned from who I was I'm different tonight Forgiveness is a two way street I’m driving down both sides Facing down parts of me I made a mess with pride I'll take my chance take a risk If you can't forgive me we'll leave it at this* I'm sorry so sorry I'm sorry so sorry I may never get the chance dear to say it to your face but if you'll ever hear (see?) me, I'll handle it with grace you know the way I hurt you I cannot believe If time could go backward I swear I'd bring a different me Forgiveness is a two way street I’m driving down both sides Facing down parts of me I made a mess with pride I'll take my chance now take a risk If you can't forgive me we'll leave it at this I'm sorry so sorry I'm sorry so sorry there will never be a day when I don't feel the weight of all of my mistakes there will never be a day when I don't feel the weight of all of my mistakes I'm sorry so sorry so sorry

about

In loving memory of Tim Boyle. Pops, I hope you like the sounds on this record!

To each person who has broken my heart, or whose heart I have broken, thank you for living this life with me and for taking part in our mutual growth and learning.

I offer my deepest gratitude to everyone who supported this project.

My dear family, Karen Tobin, Lyndsay & Martin Cavanagh, my nephews Val and Mika.

My friends and colleagues: Harlow Carpenter, Jacob Light, Tim Silva, Adri Walker, David Wellerstein, Eric Oberthaler, Julie Graffagna, Leslie Bonnett, Suzanne Yada, Joshua Pollack, Eli Wise & Stephen Switzer, Debby Wise, Daniel Phifer, Willa Mamet, Julie Wolf, Greg Sandzimier, Margaret Goodwin, Rachel MacFarlane, Charlotte Wood, Erin Fox, Elaine McGree, Kat, the women of Kitka, Elaine Ryan, Robyn Jamner, Alene Lautenschlager, Cary Butler, Brett "Snacky" Pierce. The members of the Wax Collective: Liz DeRoche, Dillbilly, Kofy Brown, Katie Cash & Genesis Fermin.

My mentors: Susan Calloway, Karen Rae Wilson, Susan Koc, Cheryl Englehardt, the Amplify community (especially my PUP), Balanced Breakfast, Ariel Hyatt and the CyberPR Team, Ever Kipp.

My loyal patrons on Patreon and each and every person who contributed to the crowdfunding campaign. I literally could not have done this without you!

credits

released April 21, 2023

Briget Boyle: vocals, acoustic guitar, percussion
Tim Silva: vocals
Genesis Fermin: drums
David Wellerstein: bass, percussion
Jacob Light: electric guitars, synth

Michael Bang: piano (1, 4, 8)
Juliana Graffagna: accordion (1)
Jan Fidelis: hand claps (6)
Lewis Patzner: cello (5, 9, 10)
Vicki Randle: vocals (8)
Karen Tobin: vocals (6)

Produced by Jacob Light and Briget Boyle
Recorded and mixed by Jacob Light at ModernTone Studios in Lafayette, CA
Mastering by Eric Oberthaler
Graphic Design by Robert Samples at Atomic Disc
Album Photography by Velvy Appleton

All songs written by Briget Boyle
Loops & Socket co-written with Tim Silva
Heartbreak Residue co-written with Adri Walker

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Briget Boyle Oakland, California

Briget's songs are compelling reminders that healing and redemption are coming. With gritty, vulnerable lyrics, pristine vocals, and driving playing on her antique Gibson J45, Briget’s songs center the truth-telling power of the human voice. Sincerity is magnetic and Briget's songs inspire listeners to put pen to paper, clear their throats, and dust off their old guitars. ... more

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